


Trevor's Struggles (WIP)

by Zazzlea



Category: Smile For Me (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Bullying, Depression, Explicit Language, Fluff, Foster Care, High School, How Do I Tag, My First Fanfic, Original Character(s), Vampires, Work In Progress
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-28
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2021-01-06 08:42:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21223766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zazzlea/pseuds/Zazzlea
Summary: Trevor struggles with life after the habitat, he isn't sure where he fits in or if he fits in at all.All he knows is that he is definitely a werewolf.





	1. High School

* * *

* * *

Trevor let out a sigh as he struggled to fall asleep, ever since he left the habitat he's found himself staying up late each night, unable to sleep. Despite Dr. Habit the tooth stealing wierdo and the vampire who he was sure wanted to drink his blood he strangely missed being at the habitat. Sure no-one really talked to him there but that was normal. At the habitat it was incredibly easy to fall asleep, and the strange mountain air seemed to help him stay relaxed and focused, more than usual at least. Best of all, he didn't feel nearly as judged there as he does everywhere else, of course there was a little judgment but everyone there were weirdos too! It was easy to take most of the unpleasant observations he received with a grain of salt at the habitat, but now that he's left he misses it dearly. School was a nightmare being in a foster home didn't help any, Trevor would have preferred being in a room filled with angry vampire dads than be back home.

Yet here he was, wide awake in his cramped and empty room. He has always had sleeping problems and had initially thought that it was simply due to the wolf blood running through his veins, but after sleeping so soundly at the habitat he wasn't sure. Since he now knew that the habitat wasn't being controlled by vampires he had no real explanation, sure mountain air was good for you but surely it wouldn't be enough to hold back his inner wolf. Trevor blinked in surprise as he heard his alarm bagin going off, he hadn't realized he had spent so much time thinking. He shut it off and got dressed, feeling sluggish from the lack of rest.

He instinctively went to put on his large scarf only to hesitate as he thought of just how overheated he felt yesterday due to his scarf. He frowned and set it down before turning to leave his bedroom only to hesitate once more. He bit his lip for a few moments before quickly turning back around to grab his scarf and wrap it around him, he wasn't willing to leave it behind, if he ends up sweating through his jacket so be it. He left his room and jogged down the stairs to the kitchen, he grabbed a blueberry poptart and his bag before dashing out of the front door. He wasn't in the mood to talk to his foster mom, he knew she would get on him about wearing his jacket again. Trevor kept his head down as he began his walk to school. He didn't want to have to deal with anyone so early especially with his lack of sleep.

As he approached the high school entrance he glanced to the left to see Nat leaning up against a wall looking at her phone. Trevor quickly looked away knowing that she would be less than pleased if he tried to talk to her, she had told him the last time he tried talking to her that she couldn't be seen with someone lame like him and that he only annoyed her at the habitat. At first he was insulted, after all, werewolves like him are beyond cool, but after getting back home his previous confidence in himself vanished and he remembered why he had gone to the habitat in the first place.

Trevor was thankful that Nat had moved to town over summer and that they had never gone to school together. Though its true that freshman year hasn't been great so far he hasn't been targeted just yet, so there was no way Nat knew how much of a loser he really was in school. He hoped that if he kept his head low this year it would stay that way, he may be an awesome yet to transform werewolf but he wasn't very strong or good at confrontation. He assumed that all his strength would come to him once he finally matured into a true werewolf, and he could wait.

Trevor went to his locker and grabbed his things for his first three periods. He turned to head to his English class only to stop as he sees Nat and her friend group round the corner, he quickly turns the other way not wanting to potentially embarrass Nat or himself. Unfortunately Trevor fails to look where he's going and walks right into an already unhappy looking student knocking them both down in the process, "O-oh sorry" Trevor says quickly scrambling to his feet and offering his hand to the student. His face pales as the boy he knocked down looks up and Trevor recognizes him as Kyle, one of his biggest bullies from middle school. Kyle looks at him blankly and begins to stand before grabbing and yanking Trevors hand down, effectively slamming Trevors face into the tile floor of the hallway, Kyle grabs the back of Trevors jacket lifting it just enough so he can see Trevors face before smirking

"Thanks." Kyle says before standing up to walk back down the hallway.

Trevor lays there for a moment before remembering where he is and scrambling back up as fast as he can ignoring how lightheaded he feels. He glances over his shoulder to see Nat's friend group staring and whispering, his heart drops as he makes brief eye contact with Nat and sees the anger on her face. He grabs his things and walks away as fast as possible.

Only when he gets to the bathroom does he realize that his nose is bleeding.


	2. Science Class

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trevor has a rude awakening and ends up next to Nat.

After stuffing his nose with the scratchy toilet paper the school provided Trevor quickly left the bathroom. He pulled his scarf up to cover the bottom half of his face as he walked to his first period. He sat down quietly and dove into his unfinished English worksheet. He knew the grade wouldn't be great but he was sure that he could at least manage a C or high D. After turning in his english sheet he lays his head on his hand and waits for the class to start. He finds English boring and the class is rather uneventful, halfway through Trevor begins drifting off he tries his best to stay awake, but finds himself giving In.

Soon enough he wakes up surrounded by students he doesn't know, the teacher has a smug look on her face as he jerks in surprise. _This the must be 2nd period class..._ He thinks sheepishly. He stands up and quickly gathers his things doing his best to ignore the probing stares and quiet laughter from the surrounding students. As he leaves the room he does his best to keep his head low, he hopes that he isn't too late for 2nd period.

He manages to get to his second period class just on time, his science teacher giving him a concerned glance as Trevor runs into the classroom. Trevor self consciously pulls his scarf back up to hide his bruised nose and starts to look around. This class had group tables and no specified seating chart, so Trevor was always extra cautious when choosing where to sit. Trevor finds himself with little options as the only two empty seats are both next to people that he knows would prefer if he stayed away. One of those seats is next to Nat, so he finds no other choice than to sit by the other student who seems to be glaring at him, clearly wanting him to stay away.

As he walks by Nat to sit next to the glaring boy he's surprised when he feels someone grab him, and looks down to see Nat holding onto his jacket a bored look on her face. He frowns and and tries to tug away from her grip only to quickly be tugged back causing him to fall over into the empty seat beside her. Though he wants to stand back up and save himself from her rage he can take a hint, and knows that leaving would certainly upset her more.

She stares forward as the class begins and the teacher starts reviewing what they've learned so far. Trevor opens his sketchbook to doodle while his teacher rambles on. Halfway through the class he notices Nat leaning over to look at his drawings, Trevor, feeling puzzled, hesitantly slides his sketchbook so it's between them. Nat gives him a blank look and for a moment Trevor finds himself panicking. Soon enough though Nat starts adding small drawings of her own to the paper. Trevor lets out a small sigh of relief and goes back to making his own small doodles, feeling slightly self conscious.

Once enough the class is over Nat begins to pack up as Trevor remains seated and looks curiously at her doodles, most of which are surprisingly cute and innocent.

"These drawings are between us, got it?" Nat says suddenly.

"Oh, yeah of course!" Trevor exclaims looking up at her in surprise.

Nat gives a small nod, "Meet me after school, we need to talk." she says before walking away.

Trevor lets out a deep sigh, unsure of what he's gotten himself into.


	3. Lunch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are 'settled' at lunch and Trevor wonders what to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another short chapter sorry!

Trevors 3rd period class went by quickly, and it was time for lunch, his favorite part of the day. He makes his way to the cafeteria and unpacks the lunch his foster mom insists on giving him. Its some simple chicken and noodle soup in a thermace today, though he isn't a big fan he supposes that it's better than the school food. As he sits at the empty table and begins eating he notices that every now and then a student will glance his way. 

"Word sure spreads fast..." Trevor muttered under his breath.

Trevor froze as he saw Kyle looking his way, Kyle gave him a friendly looking smile before he walked over to Trevors table plopping down in the seat next to him. 

"Hey Trev," Kyle said putting his hand on Trevors shoulder and looking up at him innocently, "sorry about earlier I didn't mean to pull so hard and hurt you. I just thought that a big strong werewolf like you would be fine. You know that right?" 

Trevor looked away in discomfort at the mocking tone in Kyle's voice, "Yeah well, I guess it's fine. It was my fault for bumping into you anyways," Trevor responded, "but uh, maybe next time you should watch out too?" He added quickly.

Kyle's gaze hardened for a moment and his grip on Trevor's shoulder grew painfully tight before a big smile split across his face and he abruptly stood up.

"Well I'm glad that's settled then and we both know that I didn't mean to hurt you," Kyle says loudly, "see ya around Trev!" He calls as he walks away.

Trevor shifts uncomfortably as Kyle walks away, hw frowns, if he was back at the habitat things would be different. Though it's true that he didn't interact with the other habititians very much he was sure that they wouldn't have let something like this happen to him. Trevor frowned, he wished he had talked more and had made some friends, maybe then he would be more confident in himself. He would try with Nat but she was even scarier than Kyle and certainly wasn't willing to put up with someone like him. He knew that both Millie and Putunia wouldn't tolerate this kind of bullying but they weren't even in highschool yet, and there was no way he was getting little kids involved, even if he was pretty sure they could easily chase off Kyle. TimTam was out of the question, and the rest of the habitians were adults who didn't seem too helpful in this situation.

There was also the fact that even if Trevor wanted to talk to them there was no way he would be able to. It would be incredibly embarassing, awkward, and overall a horrible experience. Trevor briefly thought of the florists kid who he never got the name of but quickly crossed them off of the list, they were completely unpredictable. Trevor wasn't sure what would happen if he told them of his plight, and he wasn't sure he wanted to find out.

The bell rang and Trevor quickly cleared his head. He would just have to find another way to deal with this, the last thing he wanted was a repeat of middle school.


	4. Confrontation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trevor and Nat finally have a talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking so long!

Trevor finished his last two classes with ease, history was boring but the worksheets were straight from the text book making the very easy to fill put. His last class was gym and though he disliked being all sweaty at the end of the day he rather enjoyed the class, though it was true that he wasn't very athletic he always did his best and loved the idea that he was getting even stronger with each class.

Trevor stood outside of his locker fiddling with his scarf as he thought about Nat, he could skip out on her but there was no doubt that she would find him; she was half vampire after all. _I'm just going to have to face this._ Trevor thought. He walked to the front doors of the school seeing Nat waiting by the door looking as indifferent as ever. As soon as Trevor fully rounded the corner her head snapped around to glare at him, Trevor gulped as he took note of her twitching nose, _I guess vampires have a pretty good sense of smell too_, he thought, _not surprising._

Trevor walked over to Nat following her as she turned her back and started walkibg ahead of him, she walked away from the building and houses into the thicket of trees that lay just beyond the school, Trevor started shaking in anticipation. Nat wouldn't kill him or drink his blood would she? Trevor shook even harder at the thought of her doing such a thing. He was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't even notice when Nat stopped until he bumped into her. He looked around to see that they were in a small clearing with a log laying right in the middle.

Trevor looked at Nat who was glaring at him. "So.."

"What was that?" Nat suddenly snapped, she paused as Trevor gave her a confused look, "In the hallway! What the hell was that!?"

"I promise that I wasn't trying to embarass you or anything!" Trevor exclaimed "I was trying to avoid you and you're group honestly and I just-"

"Seriously?! You think that's why I'm upset with you?" Nat huffed.

Trevor looked at her curiously "Uhh yeah?? You said we couldn't talk because I'm lame so I just assumed..."

"That's not why I'm mad," Nat said looking annoyed "I'm mad because you just let it happen."

Trevor frowned "So?"

"That's not like you." Nat growls

"Uhh yeah it is???" Trevor huffed starting to feel frustrated

"No it's not! Back at the habitat you wouldn't have taken that crap! You would've bitten him like you did Jimothan or scared him away by being super weird and saying you're a wolf or whatever!" Nat hissed, "You're a loser yeah but you aren't a pushover, not completely at least."

"Nat you barely know me! The habitat was different, it was less judgy, nobody payed attention to me, and I could be who I wanted; but out here in reality it's different! I can't just be myself and be happy nobody would like that! People out here are cruel and would never try to understand!" Trevor yells, " I know it must be easy for you, you're super cool and dont care about what other people think! But I do! I don't even have proof of being a werewolf! You can just flash your fangs anytime and you would have tons of people fawning over you!"

Nat stares at Trevor in surprise as he finishes his rant, she opens her mouth as if to speak but quickly shuts it and looks away. Trevor and Nat stand there for a moment, Trevor shuts his eyes taking in the silence that fell over the forest during their conversarion before turning around.

"I'm going home," he says quietly, "thanks for the talk."


	5. Written Feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trevor finds an outlet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> God this is so short I'm sorry I'll try to do better next time.

As soon as Trevor got home he went straight up to his room, his foster mom hadn't said a word as he walked by and he was grateful that she always let him have space. Feeling gross and sweaty, especially after having worn his scarf all day in the heat, he carefully took off his scarf and hung it up along with his torn up jacket. Afterwards he tossed his shirt off along with his pants and sat in front of his fan, he wasn't in the mood to get up and take a shower. Using a clean shirt to wipe himself off he welcomed the cool air as it came in contact with his skin.

After a few moments he finally stood up and let out a sigh, he knew he would have to talk to Nat again, there was no way he could try avoiding her. He didn't want her to be mad despite how upset he was at her for abandoning him after the habitat, but at the same time he didn't want to apologize for his outburst. Sure it was embarassing and something that shouldn't be shouted out in the middle of the woods, but he felt like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders and strangely enough in those few moments after he had screamed at Nat he had felt more at peace than he bas ever since he came home from the habitat. 

Trevor plopped down on his bed, "Maybe I should consider a therapist or councillor," he said outloud, "after all it did feel really good to finally tell someone," he then frowned, "but I don't think I could trust some random person with my feelings like that, I should start out small."

He leaned down to pick up his bag and pulled his drawing notebook from it. _This'll have to do for now,_ he thought to himself as he opened up to his doodles from science class. He looked at Nats drawings and observed the many small flowers she had drawn, they were all incredibly detailed and though earlier Trevor had been surprised he realized now that with a florist for a dad it shouldn't be too surprising. He was well aware that after the habitat she and her dad had gotten closer, and it was pretty clear to everyone that she had always liked flowers herself despite what she may say herself. 

After some time of admiring them he skipped ahead several pages to a blank one that he felt was far away enough from his last drawing to be written on. He fidgeted slightly unsure of what to do before writing the date on top. After pondering what to write for a few more moments he decided to just dive in, there was no way he was doing the whole dear diary thing, he wasn't five years old and was the only one who would end up reading it anyways. He let out a breath before putting his pencil to the paper.

_Today I got picked on and yelled at Nat_, he wrote, cringing at how childish it sounded, _I don't get it, any of it. I was fine and confident at the habitat, I could theorize in peace and didn't care of what others thought of me there. Yet here I am being a coward as always, I hate it, and I wish I could just be mysel_f. 

Trevor paused and tapped his pencil against his chin for a moment before deciding what to write next.

_I really do believe that I'm a werewolf, maybe that makes me crazy. I have all these wierd memories from when I was a kid, but considering how I barely remember my parents I guess that's not saying much; but still! I swear I can feel it, I know I feel something but nobody believes me and it sucks. I also know that I'm never going to get adopted, it's pretty clear. I don't care, not really, other people have it way harder and at my age adoption just doesn't happen. I'm actually kind of glad, other kids deserve it way more than me, I doubt I would be grateful enough if I was adopted, I'm not grateful enough for what I have now. There's no way that I'll be any better in the future, not at this rate at least, but maybe with practice. Maybe this will help, getting it all out, I think I like doing this._

Trevor set down his pencil and looked over what he wrote. He felt incredibly calm as he marked the page and put his notebook back in his bag. He was taken by surprise as he yawned, maybe tonight he would actually get some sleep. He smiled at the thought and curled up under his covers, waiting for sleep to carry him to the next day.


	6. UPDATE (NOT A CHAPTER)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Basically me making excuses because I'm lame.

Zazz here! Ive been neglecting this fic and I apologize, I had the next chapter in progress but due to me being in a rut and having started another fic that is written in a different tense (leaving me very confused when I write) I'm going to have to trash it and restart. That being said I haven't stopped writing this fic. Please note that I write as I go along, I have a very basic outline that I eventually write over to the point to where I'm just winging it. There is no forseeable end for me with any of my works so I can't promise deadlines or chapter updates or anything like that. It sucks for both of us and I'm trying to better myself when it comes to planning this stuff out and making drafts. My current issue is that I'm getting my tenses mixed up and I can't figure out which I like more, unfortunately I don't have an English teacher I can go to for help so I'm going off of confusing internet explanations and badly written chapters of fics I wish I could write better.  
I hope this massive excuse is enough to explain why I've been so awful at updating and that you don't get scared away by it.

Hope y'all had a good month filled with holiday fun. Peace

**Author's Note:**

> I'm going to end up editing this, don't worry! I haven't written in years, open to constructive criticism!  
My smile for me tumblr: https://5mi1ing4y0u.tumblr.com/


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